Helping others and bring them joy should not come at the expense of our own needs. You do have to take care of yourself first. No, a woman (or man) should not be expected to suffer so that others and be taken care of. The suffering and the joy should be shared with nobody carrying an excess burden.

If helping someone does not make you feel happy, you need to look inside to understand why.

If your greatest joy comes from a life that brings you joy and fulfillment at the expense of others, shame on you but you would be part of a big crowd, we see a lot of that.

TEK