It take two things to make acting meaningful. Power to make a difference and evidence to act upon.

Why do you think most often it is powerful men who are the abusers? The have little to fear from their subordinates. If I suspect my boss is abusing one of my coworkers, I can call him out but I had better have a new job lined up when I do that. What have I achieve then. I can’t even be sure my coworker will thank me. I am the conscience of my workplace. I am often the one who points out our most ethically questionable practices. I am pretty sure behind my back people whisper “playing fair is for losers.”

In my 40 year career I was laid off only once and never fired. I am pretty sure I got to the top of the lay-off list because I refused to hide our problems from our customer.

One of my former bosses was accused of sexual harassment. I was asked if I ever had reason to think he acted inappropriately. I told the truth. Before he was my boss he was having a consensual sexual relationship with one of his subordinates. Later when he was my boss I suspected that he was having a consensual sexual relationship with a woman in a different department. He was married at the time. I would not expect these to be damning but he was force to resign. So I guess it was a “pattern of behavior” thing.

Rarely are we in a position to take meaningful action. I had an ex call me saying that one of her birthday party guest would not leave. I think I was invited to the party but showing up at your ex’s party is not my kind of fun. Anyway, I got to her place and the phone was ripped out of the wall and he was in her bed. I proceeded to drag him out of the apartment. It got physical. While this was going on she called 911. They hauled him away. I think I was played.

Rarely do we have enough evidence to really act in any meaningful way and no good deed goes unpunished.

TEK